Post by JMav/JGold/RNorth/MKarloff on Jun 9, 2018 21:10:51 GMT -5
JOHNNY MAVERICK
BELIEF AKA Gas Can Apple Cider
BELIEF AKA Gas Can Apple Cider
“Twice as many title defenses as Kayla Richards in a little over half the time. Lol. She can go ahead and throw all the ‘Johnny keeps saying he’s going to retire’ shade she wants. So long as anyone can see her twitter feed we all know that’s some serious pot and kettle shit.” Johnny says, his NGW Championship over his right shoulder as he sits in the recliner ‘throne’ of his Mind Palace which I am not explaining again, god dammit.
“It’s not an accident that leading up to my big date with Adrien I find myself across the ring from one of his Guardians. The one that above all of the other seemed to be his pet project.” Johnny says as he gets out of the recliner and stands up.
“I’ve been waiting to have this chat with Jazmyn for a little bit.” Johnny says, he snaps his fingers and an image of the Guardians is projected on the wall.
“I mean, I have no ill will toward the Guardians. How could I? Josh is amongst your ranks and I feel like anyone who doesn’t like Josh is the kind of person who would be mean to a dog for no reason.” Johnny says, pointing to Josh on the projected image.
“Jessica doesn’t get her due in this company but she is sure to soon come from BEHIND and kick some serious BACKSIDE. She’s not the kind of person to sit on her HIND QUARTERS and will claw her way from the BOTTOM not make an ASS out of herself as she does it. BUTT. The joke is ‘butt’. THE JOKE WITH JESSICA IS ALWAYS BUTT AND IT WILL NEVER BE DIFFERENT. ORIGINALITY IS DEAD.” Johnny says. He takes out a gas can and pours the contents on himself before also taking out a matchbook. A Hoodie Ninja runs up and says something into his ear.
“Apple cider? Really?” Johnny asks. He takes a long pull from the gas can and shrugs.
“That is…delicious. Why are we keeping delicious non-alcoholic apple cider in gas cans?” Johnny says. The Hoodie Ninja whispers something into his ear again.
“In case I tried to self-immolate again. Yeah, that checks out.” Johnny says with a nod.
“That brings us to Jazmyn and… Well Jazmyn is good. Real real good. Not great. She could be great. I see sparks of greatness in her but there is something that’s holding her back and anyone with a good pair of eyes and ears can see what that is.” Johnny says, looking at Jazmyn on the projector screen.
“I have never seen anyone on this roster more concerned with how they are perceived by others than Jazmyn Rain. That is what is holding her back more than absolutely anything. I feel like Adrien wants to tell this to you to your face but… well he’s too nice of a guy to do that. I like that about Adrien. Adrien is not going to be the guy to tell you that there is nothing on this planet sadder than making all of your friends sit down in front of a camera and say something nice about you and then showing that to the entire audience. That is the most insecure thing I have ever heard of anyone doing.” Johnny says, behind him clips without audio play of the segment in which various NGW superstars praised Jazmyn.
“I’ll be the first to admit occasionally craving a little bit of validation for my accomplishments but MAN Jazmyn. How do you function if you’re unable to sleep if you feel like someone on this planet doesn’t respect you? It’s okay Jaz, just calm your mind and go get a bagel at that nice place at the corner store but….oh no! You tipped under 20 percent. YOU CAN NEVER GO TO THAT BAGEL PLACE AGAIN THEY HATE YOU NOW.” Johnny says, reaching off screen and grabbing a bagel. He takes a big bite out of it and raises his fists in existential turmoil.
“GOD IS DEAD!” He shouts with a mouthful of bagel, taking a moment to down the dry bagel with some gas can cider.
“You can BELIEVE you can beat me as hard as you want….but I have shown the World who I am. I’m the motherfucker you just can’t keep down. I watched with a smile as one-by-one you have all broken yourselves against me like the tide hitting a rock. Barely chipping anything away as I stand defiant. I know Adrien will be paying close attention. Good. I NEED you to be paying attention to this Adrien. I need you to believe in Jazmyn for me and then I need you to see all the good that did her. I believe in myself too Adrien but if I believed that was all that it took? I’d be wrestling Danny Hall in the opener again. I have shown myself to be an immoveable object in this ring and do you know that old expression about immoveable objects? Well the ‘Unstoppable Force’ in that expression has never been the ‘Belief’ of a man who can throw a slightly above-average dropkick. Jazmyn is bringing the handle of a knife to a gunfight. She doesn’t even have the whole fucking knife.” Johnny says
“And anyone who doesn’t like me or respect me? They can absolutely feel free to spend as much time as they like using their lips to try and find the tastiest tenth of a centimeter of my scrotum. My belt is louder than you. You and the rest of the Guardians are still patting yourselves on the back for finally getting off your asses and beating the Destroyers while I, one man, was tearing through them and taking the World Title away from their camp. You guys basked in the payoff of all of MY work against the Destroyers and you know what? That’s fine. I won’t fault you for that. All I can do at this point is beat the lot of you and show everyone who the real power behind the downfall of the Destroyers was. I’ll see you in the ring. Tell me you can beat me. Tell me you can keep me down. Tell me that my words haven't gotten to you.” Johnny says, he smirks wickedly.
“I don’t BELIEVE you.” Johnny says.