Post by Julianna DiMaria on May 20, 2018 16:14:22 GMT -5
“The Intake”
Date: May 17, 2018
Time: 10:00 AM
Julianna DiMaria is reluctantly sitting in the office of Dr. Greg Montgomery for her first session of therapy… or anger management… or whatever anyone that knows Julianna for her faults would call it. She twiddles her thumbs, clearly being bored and the look on her face is a strong indicator that she doesn’t want to be there.
Julianna (thinking): This is a waste of my time. Why am I here? Oh right, because my mother thought that this would be good for me. Whatever. I’m just going to get this nonsense over with and move on with my life because… you know… life has been pretty good lately. I’m so glad I managed to beat Martin Karloff. There I go again… winning when my back is up against the wall! GOD, I have to be one of the better clutch performers in the game the way I’m going.
Julianna has a smirk and a chuckle to herself before she hears the door behind her open.
Voice: Hello!
Julianna sighs as a man, who looks like he’s in his early fifties, walks in. He comes off confident, someone who isn’t going to be rattled easily. Julianna is a little annoyed already seeing him so confident even with his hair and goatee having slightly grayed through the years.
Julianna: So… you must be who I am here to see…
Doctor: Yes. Doctor Greg Montgomery. And you must be the young lady I’ve heard so much about. Julianna, right? I’ve seen you on television… and you’re… fascinating to say the least. I’ve even read your social media account and I can definitely see the Intermittent Explosive Disorder that you were diagnosed with. Now… we’re not going to go too deep into things. This is really the first appointment so we’re just getting to know you. Consider it… an intake…
Julianna rolls her eyes as Dr. Montgomery paces the room while he speaks.
Dr. Montgomery: Today, what I’m interested in is what makes you tick. So…
Dr. Montgomery pauses, stops at his desk and opens up a drawer, pulling out a notepad and a pen. He slides it across the desk to Julianna who glares at him.
Dr. Montgomery: I want you to write down 10 things that irritate you the most in your life. Go on… write it all down.
Julianna reluctantly takes the notepad and pen.
Julianna: Does it have to be 10?
Dr. Montgomery: At least 10… but if you have 15… or 20… or 100… feel free! Although, if you have 100, you likely need help beyond even my own means. Go on… write them down…
Julianna rolls her eyes as she begins to write down the ten things that are currently irritating her the most…
“What Irritates Me”
1: My father
2: Losing in professional wrestling
3: Ryan Keys
4: Jessica Sears
5: My childhood not being what I wanted it to be.
6: El Fuckerero Azul
7: The Guardians
8: GOL Wrestling
9: Mercedes Carter
10: Ex-boyfriend.
Julianna glares back at Dr. Montgomery and sighs.
Julianna: There. DONE!
Dr. Montgomery. Good! Now… flip the page and write down 10 regrets.
Julianna: UGH! REALLY?
Dr. Montgomery: You can’t build your future, if you don’t learn from the past.
Julianna: Whatever….
Julianna writes her list of regrets
“Regrets”
1: My father and I not being close…
2: My entire relationship with my ex-boyfriend
3: Losing in the Super Falcon Cup last year
4: Losing to Cheyenne Rae
5: Failing to win the All-Female Invitational
6: Losing my social life because of my budding wrestling career for many years
7: The Messiahs and ever having to deal with them
8: Losing the WCG West Coast Championship
9: Not being the first WCG West Coast Champion
10: Everything about GOL
Julianna: Any more lists you want me to put together?
Dr. Montgomery: Don’t worry, you’re not going to be making any more lists… at this moment in time anyway. So, let’s take a look at what you got.
Julianna slides the notepad across the desk and Dr. Montgomery picks up the notepad and reads through the “Irritation” list first, nodding as he goes along. He flips the page to the “Regrets” list and goes through them, raising his eyebrows at quite a few of them.
Dr. Montgomery: I am seeing a pattern…
Julianna: How can you see a pattern? You don’t even know me other than what I do with my life and those two lists that you had me write just now.
Dr. Montgomery: Your regrets list is full of things that have to do with “losing” something. I think it’s become clear to me, Julianna DiMaria… that you’re a perfectionist. Now, I understand your parents likely instilled that within you, but those who strive for perfection are doomed to be a failure to themselves. Number 8 and number 9 on your regrets list… they seem a bit… contradictory. You weren’t the first champion, but you lost the title?
Julianna: I was the second WCG West Coast Champion.
Dr. Montgomery: But it doesn’t mean that much to you because you weren’t the first. You have, honestly, set far too high of a standard for yourself and did you ever think that some of your goals are likely far too high to attain? I am seeing where this IED comes from, Julianna. You fail to meet these exorbitantly high goals so you get angry. And then, you get so angry that you explode with rage and do what you do. Now, as for your “What Irritates Me” list… interesting…. Quite interesting…
Julianna: And in your professional opinion, what does that say about me since you apparently know all the answers.
Dr. Montgomery: You’ve got quite a few people written on there which tells me that you have a problem with interpersonal relations. But, the one I want to talk about today is number one… because that, without a doubt, is likely the biggest source of your personality. Tell me about your father…
Julianna winces a bit, not knowing what to say.
Julianna: What is there to say about him?
Dr. Montgomery: What is your relationship like with him? Do you love him? Do you wish he behaved differently? I figured… since your top listed regret IS your relationship with him… that perhaps if we addressed this… maybe we can figure out a healthy way to cope going forward… for your benefit of course.
Julianna: Right… my dad…
Julianna’s anger dissipates and suddenly she feels glum. She lets out a soft sigh as all the regrets that have anything to do with her father at all start to flood her conscience. Her hands slightly tremble on her lap as she thinks about what she has to say about him.
Julianna: I love him… he’s my dad after all! But… he… I… I know he wishes that I was his son and not his daughter…
Her eyes begin to fill up with tears.
Julianna: And all I ever wanted was for him to reciprocate the same feelings I have for him. But… I don’t think he ever has. Either he’s got too much walls surrounding him to reciprocate my love for him or… deep down somewhere, he hates me because of my gender… or some other reason….
Dr. Montgomery: There we go… now we’re making progress…
Julianna’s tears start to flow down her face.
Julianna: THIS is progress? You don’t understand. My father… all he’s ever cared about is wrestling. It’s not like he ever bought me a pony… toy, plastic or otherwise… He never spent quality time with me outside a wrestling ring, a show, a facility or whatever… And he was always on me, pushing me, pressuring me… and all I ever wanted from him was for him to tell me he loved me back and actually mean it! We’re not close… we’ve never been close. And now? I don’t feel like I can ever be close to him.
Dr. Montgomery: Would you say that the GameCube smashing was the last straw?
Julianna nods as she wipes tears away.
Julianna: My worst fear… is being just like him. I actually want to LIVE! I don’t want to center my ENTIRE life around wrestling because I know it’s not going to last forever. Maybe if I was a son and not a daughter… he’d treat me differently and maybe we’d be close.
Dr. Montgomery: Julianna…
He pauses to take a deep breath.
Dr. Montgomery: You can’t control your gender… well… not before you’re born anyway, but I digress. Even if what you said is true, that’s his problem, not yours. It’s not your fault, that’s what I am trying to tell you. He is the way he is and unfortunately, only he can change that. But, how you can make it different is how you feel and react to the situation. How he is with you is something that shouldn’t affect you as a person. But, I do believe that he is what has made you what you are and if we can find a way to confront that, you’ll be better for it. You’re shaken up, I understand. So, we’re going to address this down the line.
Julianna: Why can’t we do it now?
Dr. Montgomery: For one, we’re out of time for today. And in my professional opinion, I think it is better for you if you build yourself up by addressing and overcoming your other irritations and regrets first… and THEN we address your father. I will leave you with this, Julianna: you are what YOU feel about you… not what your father feels about you. If you can remember that, you’ll be able to hang strong and hang tough. Great breakthrough! I’ll see you in a month. Thank you for being so open and honest.
Julianna stands up, wiping away some final tears. She begins to walk away, but she takes a momentary pause.
Julianna: No… thank you. I just… I don’t want to be some immature, little brat anymore. I just don’t know how to stop…
Dr. Montgomery: No worries, that’s what I’m here for.
Julianna takes a deep breath before she walks out of Dr. Montgomery’s office wondering both how the next appointment is going to go and how she’s going to be able to hold herself up until then.
For now?
It’s back to business inside that wrestling ring coming off a huge win against Martin Karloff.
Date: May 17, 2018
Time: 10:00 AM
Julianna DiMaria is reluctantly sitting in the office of Dr. Greg Montgomery for her first session of therapy… or anger management… or whatever anyone that knows Julianna for her faults would call it. She twiddles her thumbs, clearly being bored and the look on her face is a strong indicator that she doesn’t want to be there.
Julianna (thinking): This is a waste of my time. Why am I here? Oh right, because my mother thought that this would be good for me. Whatever. I’m just going to get this nonsense over with and move on with my life because… you know… life has been pretty good lately. I’m so glad I managed to beat Martin Karloff. There I go again… winning when my back is up against the wall! GOD, I have to be one of the better clutch performers in the game the way I’m going.
Julianna has a smirk and a chuckle to herself before she hears the door behind her open.
Voice: Hello!
Julianna sighs as a man, who looks like he’s in his early fifties, walks in. He comes off confident, someone who isn’t going to be rattled easily. Julianna is a little annoyed already seeing him so confident even with his hair and goatee having slightly grayed through the years.
Julianna: So… you must be who I am here to see…
Doctor: Yes. Doctor Greg Montgomery. And you must be the young lady I’ve heard so much about. Julianna, right? I’ve seen you on television… and you’re… fascinating to say the least. I’ve even read your social media account and I can definitely see the Intermittent Explosive Disorder that you were diagnosed with. Now… we’re not going to go too deep into things. This is really the first appointment so we’re just getting to know you. Consider it… an intake…
Julianna rolls her eyes as Dr. Montgomery paces the room while he speaks.
Dr. Montgomery: Today, what I’m interested in is what makes you tick. So…
Dr. Montgomery pauses, stops at his desk and opens up a drawer, pulling out a notepad and a pen. He slides it across the desk to Julianna who glares at him.
Dr. Montgomery: I want you to write down 10 things that irritate you the most in your life. Go on… write it all down.
Julianna reluctantly takes the notepad and pen.
Julianna: Does it have to be 10?
Dr. Montgomery: At least 10… but if you have 15… or 20… or 100… feel free! Although, if you have 100, you likely need help beyond even my own means. Go on… write them down…
Julianna rolls her eyes as she begins to write down the ten things that are currently irritating her the most…
“What Irritates Me”
1: My father
2: Losing in professional wrestling
3: Ryan Keys
4: Jessica Sears
5: My childhood not being what I wanted it to be.
6: El Fuckerero Azul
7: The Guardians
8: GOL Wrestling
9: Mercedes Carter
10: Ex-boyfriend.
Julianna glares back at Dr. Montgomery and sighs.
Julianna: There. DONE!
Dr. Montgomery. Good! Now… flip the page and write down 10 regrets.
Julianna: UGH! REALLY?
Dr. Montgomery: You can’t build your future, if you don’t learn from the past.
Julianna: Whatever….
Julianna writes her list of regrets
“Regrets”
1: My father and I not being close…
2: My entire relationship with my ex-boyfriend
3: Losing in the Super Falcon Cup last year
4: Losing to Cheyenne Rae
5: Failing to win the All-Female Invitational
6: Losing my social life because of my budding wrestling career for many years
7: The Messiahs and ever having to deal with them
8: Losing the WCG West Coast Championship
9: Not being the first WCG West Coast Champion
10: Everything about GOL
Julianna: Any more lists you want me to put together?
Dr. Montgomery: Don’t worry, you’re not going to be making any more lists… at this moment in time anyway. So, let’s take a look at what you got.
Julianna slides the notepad across the desk and Dr. Montgomery picks up the notepad and reads through the “Irritation” list first, nodding as he goes along. He flips the page to the “Regrets” list and goes through them, raising his eyebrows at quite a few of them.
Dr. Montgomery: I am seeing a pattern…
Julianna: How can you see a pattern? You don’t even know me other than what I do with my life and those two lists that you had me write just now.
Dr. Montgomery: Your regrets list is full of things that have to do with “losing” something. I think it’s become clear to me, Julianna DiMaria… that you’re a perfectionist. Now, I understand your parents likely instilled that within you, but those who strive for perfection are doomed to be a failure to themselves. Number 8 and number 9 on your regrets list… they seem a bit… contradictory. You weren’t the first champion, but you lost the title?
Julianna: I was the second WCG West Coast Champion.
Dr. Montgomery: But it doesn’t mean that much to you because you weren’t the first. You have, honestly, set far too high of a standard for yourself and did you ever think that some of your goals are likely far too high to attain? I am seeing where this IED comes from, Julianna. You fail to meet these exorbitantly high goals so you get angry. And then, you get so angry that you explode with rage and do what you do. Now, as for your “What Irritates Me” list… interesting…. Quite interesting…
Julianna: And in your professional opinion, what does that say about me since you apparently know all the answers.
Dr. Montgomery: You’ve got quite a few people written on there which tells me that you have a problem with interpersonal relations. But, the one I want to talk about today is number one… because that, without a doubt, is likely the biggest source of your personality. Tell me about your father…
Julianna winces a bit, not knowing what to say.
Julianna: What is there to say about him?
Dr. Montgomery: What is your relationship like with him? Do you love him? Do you wish he behaved differently? I figured… since your top listed regret IS your relationship with him… that perhaps if we addressed this… maybe we can figure out a healthy way to cope going forward… for your benefit of course.
Julianna: Right… my dad…
Julianna’s anger dissipates and suddenly she feels glum. She lets out a soft sigh as all the regrets that have anything to do with her father at all start to flood her conscience. Her hands slightly tremble on her lap as she thinks about what she has to say about him.
Julianna: I love him… he’s my dad after all! But… he… I… I know he wishes that I was his son and not his daughter…
Her eyes begin to fill up with tears.
Julianna: And all I ever wanted was for him to reciprocate the same feelings I have for him. But… I don’t think he ever has. Either he’s got too much walls surrounding him to reciprocate my love for him or… deep down somewhere, he hates me because of my gender… or some other reason….
Dr. Montgomery: There we go… now we’re making progress…
Julianna’s tears start to flow down her face.
Julianna: THIS is progress? You don’t understand. My father… all he’s ever cared about is wrestling. It’s not like he ever bought me a pony… toy, plastic or otherwise… He never spent quality time with me outside a wrestling ring, a show, a facility or whatever… And he was always on me, pushing me, pressuring me… and all I ever wanted from him was for him to tell me he loved me back and actually mean it! We’re not close… we’ve never been close. And now? I don’t feel like I can ever be close to him.
Dr. Montgomery: Would you say that the GameCube smashing was the last straw?
Julianna nods as she wipes tears away.
Julianna: My worst fear… is being just like him. I actually want to LIVE! I don’t want to center my ENTIRE life around wrestling because I know it’s not going to last forever. Maybe if I was a son and not a daughter… he’d treat me differently and maybe we’d be close.
Dr. Montgomery: Julianna…
He pauses to take a deep breath.
Dr. Montgomery: You can’t control your gender… well… not before you’re born anyway, but I digress. Even if what you said is true, that’s his problem, not yours. It’s not your fault, that’s what I am trying to tell you. He is the way he is and unfortunately, only he can change that. But, how you can make it different is how you feel and react to the situation. How he is with you is something that shouldn’t affect you as a person. But, I do believe that he is what has made you what you are and if we can find a way to confront that, you’ll be better for it. You’re shaken up, I understand. So, we’re going to address this down the line.
Julianna: Why can’t we do it now?
Dr. Montgomery: For one, we’re out of time for today. And in my professional opinion, I think it is better for you if you build yourself up by addressing and overcoming your other irritations and regrets first… and THEN we address your father. I will leave you with this, Julianna: you are what YOU feel about you… not what your father feels about you. If you can remember that, you’ll be able to hang strong and hang tough. Great breakthrough! I’ll see you in a month. Thank you for being so open and honest.
Julianna stands up, wiping away some final tears. She begins to walk away, but she takes a momentary pause.
Julianna: No… thank you. I just… I don’t want to be some immature, little brat anymore. I just don’t know how to stop…
Dr. Montgomery: No worries, that’s what I’m here for.
Julianna takes a deep breath before she walks out of Dr. Montgomery’s office wondering both how the next appointment is going to go and how she’s going to be able to hold herself up until then.
For now?
It’s back to business inside that wrestling ring coming off a huge win against Martin Karloff.
