Post by Jack Tillman on Sept 30, 2017 19:15:25 GMT -5
So ah.......entry journal number one. Date is.....date is October 1st 1997.
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Don't really know what I'm doing with this to tell you the truth. Doc said it might help if I did a taped journal. I think it's bullshit but……well I guess I sort of need it at this moment.
So……fuck it.
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3 months ago I landed funny on my neck. Almost broke it. Tommy fucking Domingo gave me a pile driver during the end of a one on one match in Some small Indy show in no where Indiana. I've taken plenty of pile drivers in my day. Stings and hurts like hell but I've always been able to function after it's been delivered. Not this time though. As soon as I was landed on the top of my head I knew something was wrong because I had a jolt go up my spine. Then tingling. Tommy fucking pinned me and I tried to kick out. I wanted to kick out. I put everything I had in me to kick out. But I couldn't. I couldn't move. I couldn't lift my shoulder. I couldn't even lift my finger.
I looked up at the ceiling and saw as Tommy raised his hands up in victory. I watched as the fans booed him. I watched as his music played. I watched at the ref kneeled down to see how I was doing. I watched as he turned white in fear. I watched as he threw an X in the air to the back. I watched as medical staff came over and checked me out. I watched as they carted me off to an ambulance. I watched as my wrestling career ended as doctors sliced open my spine and did surgery.
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Three months of surgery, rehab, and recovery. Thousands of dollars spent so that I could get movement back in my body. Doctors say that I still have a long road to recovery but that I'll be able to move around and function as a normal human being in the next two to here years. Good news was that if I wasn't a wrestler and hadn't had those muscles around my neck I would had been paralyzed for the rest of my life…..stuck on a fucking wheel chair. Bad news is that my wrestling career is over with.
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What is a man to do when the only thing he's ever known is wrestling. A man who started his wrestling career handing out flyers for Bad Man Jimmy Wagner's Chicago Pro Wrestling at the age of 10 to now not being able to provide for his wife and 5 and three year old kids at the age of 36.
No college education, kicked out of the Navy, multiple arrest records, and won't be able to do any physical labor for the rest of my life. The wife meanwhile is a nurse who won't be able to withstand the mortgage and daily finances of my medical bills and two little kids.
So yeah......I'm a little depressed.
Doc said that talking about my situation might help. Just do an audio journal. Keep up with how I'm feeling. Let it all go.
Better than laying in my bed and watching day time television I guess.
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See you around Space Cowboy……
