Post by Kimo on Jul 14, 2018 14:17:28 GMT -5
-July 13th, 2018-
The Beachouse, Living Room.
Kimo and Kate are channel surfing. Trying to find something to watch.
Kate: I just thought of something funny.
Kimo: Whats that?
Kate: You're from Hawaii, you live on the beach, yet this is the only surfing you do?
Kimo: Hey we don't all surf. Just like you guys don't all sound like Lucky the Leprechaun.
Kimo changes the channel.
TV: ONE PUNCH!!!!
Kate: Hey look, your next Halloween costume!
Kimo: Oh, so thats how it is?
Kimo switches the channel and an old Riverdance show is playing on tv.
Kimo: See any relatives?
Kate: Shut up, you feckin' smartarse. Change the chanel.
Kimo turns the channel amd the news comes on.
Anchor: Celebrity tattoo artist Heather Greggman announced she is launching a new clothing line, proceeds of which will be donated to the "Pure Life" foundation a known anti-vaccination group.
Heather: "My new line will help fund their research and finally expose the horrible truth about the pharmaceutical industry and the poison they've been forcing upon our children...."
Kimo: I always knew she was crazy, just not THIS kind.
Kate: Who's crazy now?
Kimo: My ex.
Kate: Aren't they all?
Kimo: Not as crazy as THAT!
Kate: Wait...THAT'S your ex!?
Kimo: Yup, she's just trying to stay relevant. So she decided to turn on the batshit signal and announce to the world...
Kate: That she's flat out nuts?
Kimo: Exactly. So I dodged a bullet there.
Kate: More like a banzai bill of you ask me.
Kimo Just stares at her blankly.
Kate: I played a lot of Super Mario World when I was a kid.
Kimo: We are gonna have some NERDY ass kids.
The newlyweds sit in silence
Kate: Netflix?
Kimo: ...and chill?
Kate: Well we can cut out the Netflix then.
-July 14th-
Redondo Beach Pier.
Kimo is jogging on the main boardwalk wearing black basketball shorts, running shoes, a simple grey hoodie and a pair of headphones planned firmly in his ears. He reaches what used to be the Redondo Beach Fun Factory and looks at it nostalgically before finishing whats left of his jog. He walks around the main boardwalk and turns to the camera.
Kimo: Oh, howzit? Long time, eh? So it looks like I'm up against a real piece of work this time around. It's ok, though. I've seen people like him before in this business. Each one of them now know what False Crack Medevac means. Now lets just cut the crap and get to it, yeah?
Jimmy...Jimmy...Jimmy. You're probably wondering exactly why I'm your next opponent. Well then, let me just tell you. I'm here because your therapist has officially given up on you. You're a lost cause. So its been decided that they're just gonna let you slide further and further into your psychosis until you ultimatley destroy yourself. Well lucky you because, with me being your next opponent, I decided to take it upon myself to accelerate that process.
I come highly recommended when it comes to dealing with people like you. The WCG brass must have gotten wind of this little hobby of mine and decided to put my skills to use against you and give you the ass whooping your parents should have given you years ago.
You see I've made a career out of bringing people like you back to reality. Someone believes their own hype of it too much I get called in to take them down a peg or two. You, Jimmy, are no different.
Back when I was AWA's International Champion, a man by the name of Alex Young was gunning for my title while dressed in a pink onesie and calling himself the "Pink Bro Man." That man's head was so far up his own ass with that I'll conceived gimmick he could see the back of his own teeth. It took two attempts for me to pull it out of there and make him grow the hell up.
Then, there was the so-called "Mr. Impressive," aka the infamous Josh Woodrum. This guy was the Imperial Grand Wizard of Douchedom. He thought he could get anything he wanted by throwing the right amount of money around, including championship titles. It was a long and drawn-out fight, but one cage match in Berlin brought him down like the wall that once divided that City.
The moral of the story is I will not tolerate people who treat this like it's a game. Everyone that I associate with has one thing in common we all love what we do. And we can't stand it when people like you take a big steaming dump over something we put our bodies on the line for on a regular basis while people like you parade around looking like something that doesn't belong at Comic-Con let alone a wrestling ring.
Now we come to your pathetic, wannabe-mall-goth ass. You look like someone who shops exclusively at Spencer's because he thinks it still scares people. Speaking of which, that Tijuana-back-alley hackjob you did on my picture does not intimidate me at all. It just gives me another reason for me to want to kick your ass back to being Jimmy Pridmore
You can't scare someone like me, I've made my bones in this business AND the MMA world; 2 Heavyweight MMA titles, the AWA International title. You, on the other hand, haven't even won a title yet and you think you can step to me? They call me "The Savage," a name I EARNED just so you know, for a reason. It's so that whelps like you think twice before challenging one of the big dogs.
You want to make a statement, you want to be respected, to be taken seriously. It's a respectable goal, but nobody's going to take you seriously if you don't do the same thing for yourself. So I'm going to exend to you the same ultimatum that I gave to Alex Young and Josh Woodrum all those years ago....drop the ACT!!! Grow the fuck up and start taking this seriously. If you don't, I might just make that skull painted on half of your face real. I will beat you to the point where every day you put on your little clown outfit, you remember...VIVIDLY...the pain I brought down on you to the point where I make you drop this whole Nite Stalker wannabe horseshit entirely.
The WCG universe is sick of your shit, Jimmy boy. Plain and simple. I'm just the guy they chose to deliver the message. However, unlike your family, I wont give up until you fucking GET IT!!! My only regret about this is whole thing is that I won't be able to see the look on your face when you realize that you just picked a fight with the wrong guy. See you in the ring, boy.
He puts his headphones back on, as the camera fades to black you can hear the song currently playing from his workout playlist.
EMINEM (Through headphones): "Snap back to reality. Oh there goes gravity..."
The Beachouse, Living Room.
Kimo and Kate are channel surfing. Trying to find something to watch.
Kate: I just thought of something funny.
Kimo: Whats that?
Kate: You're from Hawaii, you live on the beach, yet this is the only surfing you do?
Kimo: Hey we don't all surf. Just like you guys don't all sound like Lucky the Leprechaun.
Kimo changes the channel.
TV: ONE PUNCH!!!!
Kate: Hey look, your next Halloween costume!
Kimo: Oh, so thats how it is?
Kimo switches the channel and an old Riverdance show is playing on tv.
Kimo: See any relatives?
Kate: Shut up, you feckin' smartarse. Change the chanel.
Kimo turns the channel amd the news comes on.
Anchor: Celebrity tattoo artist Heather Greggman announced she is launching a new clothing line, proceeds of which will be donated to the "Pure Life" foundation a known anti-vaccination group.
Heather: "My new line will help fund their research and finally expose the horrible truth about the pharmaceutical industry and the poison they've been forcing upon our children...."
Kimo: I always knew she was crazy, just not THIS kind.
Kate: Who's crazy now?
Kimo: My ex.
Kate: Aren't they all?
Kimo: Not as crazy as THAT!
Kate: Wait...THAT'S your ex!?
Kimo: Yup, she's just trying to stay relevant. So she decided to turn on the batshit signal and announce to the world...
Kate: That she's flat out nuts?
Kimo: Exactly. So I dodged a bullet there.
Kate: More like a banzai bill of you ask me.
Kimo Just stares at her blankly.
Kate: I played a lot of Super Mario World when I was a kid.
Kimo: We are gonna have some NERDY ass kids.
The newlyweds sit in silence
Kate: Netflix?
Kimo: ...and chill?
Kate: Well we can cut out the Netflix then.
-July 14th-
Redondo Beach Pier.
Kimo is jogging on the main boardwalk wearing black basketball shorts, running shoes, a simple grey hoodie and a pair of headphones planned firmly in his ears. He reaches what used to be the Redondo Beach Fun Factory and looks at it nostalgically before finishing whats left of his jog. He walks around the main boardwalk and turns to the camera.
Kimo: Oh, howzit? Long time, eh? So it looks like I'm up against a real piece of work this time around. It's ok, though. I've seen people like him before in this business. Each one of them now know what False Crack Medevac means. Now lets just cut the crap and get to it, yeah?
Jimmy...Jimmy...Jimmy. You're probably wondering exactly why I'm your next opponent. Well then, let me just tell you. I'm here because your therapist has officially given up on you. You're a lost cause. So its been decided that they're just gonna let you slide further and further into your psychosis until you ultimatley destroy yourself. Well lucky you because, with me being your next opponent, I decided to take it upon myself to accelerate that process.
I come highly recommended when it comes to dealing with people like you. The WCG brass must have gotten wind of this little hobby of mine and decided to put my skills to use against you and give you the ass whooping your parents should have given you years ago.
You see I've made a career out of bringing people like you back to reality. Someone believes their own hype of it too much I get called in to take them down a peg or two. You, Jimmy, are no different.
Back when I was AWA's International Champion, a man by the name of Alex Young was gunning for my title while dressed in a pink onesie and calling himself the "Pink Bro Man." That man's head was so far up his own ass with that I'll conceived gimmick he could see the back of his own teeth. It took two attempts for me to pull it out of there and make him grow the hell up.
Then, there was the so-called "Mr. Impressive," aka the infamous Josh Woodrum. This guy was the Imperial Grand Wizard of Douchedom. He thought he could get anything he wanted by throwing the right amount of money around, including championship titles. It was a long and drawn-out fight, but one cage match in Berlin brought him down like the wall that once divided that City.
The moral of the story is I will not tolerate people who treat this like it's a game. Everyone that I associate with has one thing in common we all love what we do. And we can't stand it when people like you take a big steaming dump over something we put our bodies on the line for on a regular basis while people like you parade around looking like something that doesn't belong at Comic-Con let alone a wrestling ring.
Now we come to your pathetic, wannabe-mall-goth ass. You look like someone who shops exclusively at Spencer's because he thinks it still scares people. Speaking of which, that Tijuana-back-alley hackjob you did on my picture does not intimidate me at all. It just gives me another reason for me to want to kick your ass back to being Jimmy Pridmore
You can't scare someone like me, I've made my bones in this business AND the MMA world; 2 Heavyweight MMA titles, the AWA International title. You, on the other hand, haven't even won a title yet and you think you can step to me? They call me "The Savage," a name I EARNED just so you know, for a reason. It's so that whelps like you think twice before challenging one of the big dogs.
You want to make a statement, you want to be respected, to be taken seriously. It's a respectable goal, but nobody's going to take you seriously if you don't do the same thing for yourself. So I'm going to exend to you the same ultimatum that I gave to Alex Young and Josh Woodrum all those years ago....drop the ACT!!! Grow the fuck up and start taking this seriously. If you don't, I might just make that skull painted on half of your face real. I will beat you to the point where every day you put on your little clown outfit, you remember...VIVIDLY...the pain I brought down on you to the point where I make you drop this whole Nite Stalker wannabe horseshit entirely.
The WCG universe is sick of your shit, Jimmy boy. Plain and simple. I'm just the guy they chose to deliver the message. However, unlike your family, I wont give up until you fucking GET IT!!! My only regret about this is whole thing is that I won't be able to see the look on your face when you realize that you just picked a fight with the wrong guy. See you in the ring, boy.
He puts his headphones back on, as the camera fades to black you can hear the song currently playing from his workout playlist.
EMINEM (Through headphones): "Snap back to reality. Oh there goes gravity..."